December 08, 2005

WAR!ON!CHRISTMAS!KNITTING!

We break this blog’s intended content about the colour choice for Salina to bring you the following breaking news flash!

It is under two weeks before I get on a plane, fly over the big blue ocean and am back in the land of materialism, the US of A for a cheer, a jeer and all that good stuff with Mama Mao and friends. However, the knitting of gifts- it not be done. I swear for all that Zoom Zoom start, it feels never ending and seems like I will NOT be crossing the finishing line. Yup that’s me- fount of positive thinking. Let’s all gather the power of positive thought and think about how Tink will be knitting this weekend in Bretagne and Normandie in front of a BLAZING fire. How she will finish a Clapotis or freaking sock otherwise?? She will not leave for the Holidays with out having achieved success!

So instead of the Bush Administration and the War!on!Terror! (which seriously I can’t wait for CNN but I know seeing that much about US politics will bring my Tourettes back out of remission. Yes I will need to attend the “anonymous” meetings for people who shout at their televisions…) I bring you the War!on!Christmas!Knitting! I am in my own version of Christmas knitting panic mode- so this justifies setting my pacifist tendencies aside and gives me the executive power to declare war on something right?? Ignore my granola girl pacifist tendencies... Declare War!on!Christmas!Knitting! War on the socks… War on the Clapotis… War on Helen’s Sweater… War on Pretty Wrappy Top…

What brought this all about from a self-ascribed pacifist?? Hey homicide is not the same as war :) Well it was looking around and hearing about the religious nutjobs already from this side of the pond, knowing that I will hear about them in the US. Nutjobs like these. NO I AM NOT talking about you normal religious people who are respectful of all to believe as they choose and just want to spread holiday cheer.

I mean the ones squealing about victimization or persecution of the majority as someone dares to say Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas. Or anyone calling the ACLU the “Against Christmas Liberties Union,” you know the Union that is out to get you, your children, that mythical creation of “American culture,” and the baby Jesus too. Consider this a warning- any person who chants the talking point about putting the Christ back in CHRISTmas… or even better tasting the Christ in Grandma’s CHRISTmas cookies- they are getting smacked upside the head with a nice shouting side of "Homey don't play that!"

Posted by Stinkerbell at December 8, 2005 05:06 PM | TrackBack
Comments